urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia Waxing Ecstatic Waxing Ecstatic 2005-12-21T22:07:16Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:185206 2005-12-21T22:07:16Z 2005-12-21T22:07:16Z It's been a very long time since I last updated this journal.<br />It's been well over a year since I've talked to many of you.<br />I have changed a lot of things in my life and I am a much happier (and stable) person than I ever was. I would like to extend the invitation to all of you to get to know me again, but only if you wish. I understand if you harbor bitter feelings from past events - we all do and it's natural, and I don't hold that against you. I was going through an extremely... weird, unstable, emotional and difficult time when I got to know and the last time I talked to some of you. We all go through things like that in our life and it's hard to deal with people when they ARE in those situations.. you never know what's next.<br /><br />Anyway, it's all good in da hood, baby! Write me. If you'd like to be added to my more normally updated journal, let me know. Comment here. Something. I'd love to talk to you again.<br /><br />We'll be back in Washington for good the first half of January... hopefully we can catch up.<br /><br />~Nicole urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:184714 2004-06-30T10:43:07Z 2004-06-30T10:43:07Z <p><font color="#990000"><i><u><font size="4">Bird On The Wire</font></u></i> </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">Like a bird on the wire, </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">like a drunk in a midnight choir </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">I have tried in my way to be free. </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">Like a worm on a hook, </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">like a knight from some old fashioned book </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">I have saved all my ribbons for thee. </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">If I, if I have been unkind, </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">I hope that you can just let it go by. </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">If I, if I have been untrue </font></p> <p><font color="#990000" size="2">I hope you know it was never to you. </font></p> <p><font color="#990000"></font>&nbsp;</p> <p><font color="#990000"><i>~Leonard Cohen</i> </font></p> <p>&nbsp;</p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:184360 2004-06-30T06:55:07Z 2004-06-30T06:55:07Z How I wish,<br />How I wish you were here.<br />We're just two lost souls<br />Swimming in a fish bowl<br />Year after year.<br />Running over the same old ground;<br />What have we found?<br />The same old fears.<br />I wish you were here. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:183046 2004-06-22T04:08:42Z 2004-06-22T04:10:24Z It's nine o'clock on monday night.<br /><br />I have the rest of my laundry to do.<br /><br />I just got out of the shower.<br /><br />My car is sitting outside in the driveway, begging me to drive somewhere.<br /><br />Ohhhh wait. I need $45 before I can get the licensing done. Psh!<br /><br />Dude.<br /><br />I am bored for the first time since I moved.<br /><br />DUN Dun dunnnnn.<br /><br /><br />I wish I had friends I could visit here in town. Damnit. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:182777 2004-06-20T00:05:00Z 2004-06-20T00:05:00Z oh. yeah.<br /><br />the weight loss is up to 58lbs now. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:182165 2004-06-10T05:58:17Z 2004-06-10T05:59:43Z The Buddha mentioned speech often because people have great difficulty with it. Their speech usually lacks warmth and intimacy, not because of what they say but because of what they feel. The Buddha's guidelines are to generate unconditional love in our hearts, a love that does not depend on other people's lovability. Only the arahant--the fully enlightened one--is totally lovable. Everybody else has some defilements. It's useless to consider other people's defilements; the only defilements that are of any interest to us are our own. They are exactly the same as everybody else's, only in different proportions.<br /><br /> Wrong speech is not necessarily abusive; it can be unkind, sarcastic, self-congratulatory, or self-inflating. These are all unwholesome ways of speaking. We eradicate them through purification and recurrent deliberation, checking ourselves again and again.<br /><br /> Right speech includes not lying, not backbiting, not speaking unkindly or abusively, not gossiping, not chattering idly, not setting one person against another. Unless we use speech skillfully, polishing it so that it has the desired impact without unpleasant repercussions, we haven't heard the Buddha's words properly. This aspect of his teaching has great importance for all of us. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:180625 2004-06-08T19:18:06Z 2004-06-08T19:21:46Z and I gotta just say before I forget...<br /><br />90.3/91.7 KEXP is such a wonderful radio station. <br />They have so much great music... a *lot* of local stuff, interesting shows and programs.<br /><br />Check 'em out, if you're in the Seattle area.<br /><br />Even if you're not, you can listen from their webpage. <br /><br /><a href="http://www.kexp.org/">http://www.kexp.org/</a> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:180406 2004-06-08T19:08:53Z 2004-06-08T19:08:53Z This song completely describes my life the past few days. <br />:)<br /><br /><br />Jem - Finally Woken<br /><br />Finally Woken, Finally Woken<br /><br />I've been thinking ‘bout things<br />For a long while<br />I'm feeling so calm<br />I've got a big smile<br />I have a view of the sun<br />Right over the sea<br />And now I can feel<br />Life is flowing through me<br /><br />You see I've finally woken<br />From a long sleep<br />I'm ready to jump<br />To make that blind leap<br />Coz I now believe<br />I have the power in me<br />I've got the faith baby<br />I can truly be free<br /><br />Finally Woken<br />Finally Woken<br /><br />Child don't worry it's ok<br />The sun is out for another day<br />And I say it'll be alright<br />[be alright]<br />Today's the first day of the<br />rest of your life<br />Remember, remember,<br />remember this, remember<br /><br />Child don't worry it's ok<br />[I've got a big smile/I feel good]<br />The sun is out for another day<br />[someone's shining on me]<br />And I say it'll be alright<br />[be alright]<br />Today's the first day of the<br />rest of your life<br />Remember Remember<br />Remember this Remember<br /><br />Child don't worry it's ok<br />The sun is out for another day<br />Today's the first day of the<br />rest of your life<br />And I say it'll be alright<br />[be alright]<br />Remember, remember,<br />remember this, remember<br /><br />Finally Woken<br />[I've got a big smile/I feel good]<br />Finally Woken<br />[someone's shining on me]<br />Finally Woken<br />[I've got a big smile/I feel good]<br />Finally Woken<br />[someone's shining on me]<br />And I say it'll be alright, be alright<br />And I say it'll be alright, be alright urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:178962 2004-06-06T19:23:26Z 2004-06-06T19:23:26Z Okay, this is just *weird*<br /><br /><a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/3775957.stm">http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/3775957.stm</a><br /><br /><b>Cheese artist creates bed of ham</b><br /><br /><img src="http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/40232000/jpg/_40232643_bedofham_ap_story203.jpg"><br /><br />A US artist who once painted a house with tonnes of mozzarella cheese has covered a bed with slices of processed ham for his latest work.<br /><br />Artist Cosimo Cavallaro unveiled the piece at a gallery at the Roger Smith Hotel in Manhattan on Thursday.<br /><br />Mr Cavallaro sliced 140kg of ham and placed it on the bed. The ham will be kept in the air-conditioned gallery for two days.<br /><br />"I feel like I am back in my mother's deli," Mr Cavallaro said.<br /><br />The installation took three-and-a-half hours to build.<br /><br />Mr Cavallaro, 41, said he was not concerned about attracting a pest problem. "They are welcome," he said. "Imagine what this looks like from the point of view of an insect."<br /><br />Whetting appetites<br /><br />The artists said he had often spent his summer holidays slicing ham at his mother's delicatessen in Montreal, Canada.<br /><br />He said he had asked his mother not to come to the installation. "She would want to get in on the act," he said.<br /><br />Local deli owners said they were getting more customers because the installation had whetted people's appetites.<br /><br />He said he had decided to use processed ham because it was "a pure form of America: all kinds of parts, boiled and pressed together".<br /><br />"The smells bring you back to unexpected places," he said. "It's very special."<br /><br />In 2001 Mr Cavallaro painted a house in Powell, Wyoming, with several tonnes of cheese. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:178735 2004-06-06T19:07:14Z 2004-06-06T19:07:14Z I have the same birthday as:<br /><br /><br />Bono Vox<br />Chris Novoselic<br />Young MC<br />Sid Vicious<br />Teri Copley<br />John Wilkes Booth<br />Fred Astaire<br />Gary Owens<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />On my birthday in history:<br /><br /><br />Paper invented (China; 105 CE)<br /><br />Michelangelo commissioned to paint Sistine Chapel<br /><br />Ivory Billed Woodpecker declared extinct <br /><br />Transcontinental Railroad completed (1869)<br /><br />1st Planetarium in US opened<br /><br />Battle of Ft. Ticonderoga (1775)<br /><br />2nd Continental Congress met in Philadelphia (1775)<br /><br />Frigate United States launched<br /><br />1st Archeological Society founded<br /><br />Largest Sturgeon caught (407 lbs.)<br /><br />1st Woman nominated for US President (Victoria Woo) <br /><br />Pullman Strike began (1894)<br /><br />Werewolf in London premiered<br /><br />1st Europe-wide newspaper published (1990)<br /><br />Wounded Knee standoff ended (1973)<br /><br />American Equal Rights Association founded (1866)<br /><br />Last Laverne & Shirley episode aired (1983)<br /><br />1st Year without a reported lynching in US South (1940)<br /><br />Nazis began burning "unGerman" books (1933) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:178503 2004-06-06T11:06:50Z 2004-06-06T11:06:50Z excerpt from La Belle Dame Sans Merci by W.B. Keats - 1819<br /><br /><br />I met a lady in the meads,<br />Full beautiful--a faery's child,<br />Her hair was long, her foot was light,<br />And her eyes were wild.<br /><br />I made a garland for her head,<br />And bracelets too, and fragrant zone;<br />She looked at me as she did love,<br />And made sweet moan.<br /><br />I set her on my pacing steed,<br />And nothing else saw all day long,<br />For sidelong would she bend, and sing<br />A faery's song.<br /><br />She found me roots of relish sweet,<br />And honey wild, and manna dew,<br />And sure in language strange she said--<br />"I love thee true."<br /><br />She took me to her elfin grot,<br />And there she wept and sighed full sore,<br />And there I shut her wild eyes<br />With kisses four.<br /><br />And there she lulled me asleep<br />And there I dreamed--ah! woe betide!<br />The latest dream I ever dreamed<br />On the cold hill's side.<br /><br />I saw pale kings and princes too,<br />Pale warriors, death-pale were they all;<br />They cried--"La Belle Dame sans Merci<br />Hath thee in thrall!"<br /><br />I saw their starved lips in the gloam,<br />With horrid warning gaped wide,<br />And I awoke and found me here,<br />On the cold hill's side.<br /><br />And this is why I sojourn here<br />Alone and palely loitering,<br />Though the sedge is withered from the lake,<br />And no birds sing. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:176123 2004-06-03T00:50:24Z 2004-06-03T00:50:24Z If there are numerous maggot ass sucking fuckheads on your friends list that keep posting shit like this in their journals, post this exact sentence in YOUR journal!!!!!!1!11one1uno!eleven11!!1!! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:175789 2004-05-31T18:26:58Z 2004-05-31T18:26:58Z He who fights with monsters might take care<br />lest he thereby become a monster.<br />And if you gaze for long into an abyss,<br />the abyss gazes also into you.<br /><br />-Friedrich Nietzsche urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:174232 2004-05-25T02:02:42Z 2004-05-25T02:02:42Z We’re a happy family we’re a happy family we’re a happy family me mom and daddy<br />We’re a happy family we’re a happy family we’re a happy family me mom and daddy<br /><br />Siting here in queens <br />eating refried beans <br />we’re in all the magazines<br />Gulpin’ down thorazines <br />we ain’t got no friends <br />our troubles never end<br />No christmas cards to send <br />daddy likes men <br /><br />daddy’s telling lies <br />baby’s eating flies<br />Mommy’s on pills <br />baby’s got the chills <br />I’m friends with the president<br />I’m friends with the pope <br />we’re all making a fortune <br />selling daddy’s dope<br /><br />Siting here in queens <br />eating refried beans <br />we’re in all the magazines<br />Gulpin’ down thorazines <br />we ain’t got no friends <br />our troubles never end<br />No christmas cards to send <br />daddy likes men<br /><br />We’re a happy family we’re a happy family we’re a happy family me mom and daddy... urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:173916 2004-05-24T01:00:25Z 2004-05-24T01:00:25Z If you don't use ordinary life as a method to meditation, your meditation is bound to become something of an escape. <br />If your ordinary life becomes extraordinary, only then are you spiritual.<br /><br />Zen urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:173610 2004-05-23T19:49:49Z 2004-05-23T19:49:49Z preparing everything kosher is sorta fun.<br /><br />I'm house sitting (until today) at grace and kevin's house, and over the weekend, I didn't screw up once with the dishes or preparation or silverware or anything.<br /><br />woo!<br /><br />kosher is neat! :D urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:171457 2004-05-17T21:36:14Z 2004-05-17T21:36:14Z Dear Sir or Madam,<br /><br /><br /> We regret to inform you that your birth was an accident as a result of product failure. Please report to your local hospital to be put down.<br /><br /><br /> Thank you for your cooperation,<br /><br /><br /> Durex<br /> SSL International plc urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:169003 2004-05-11T02:19:27Z 2004-05-11T04:44:27Z I just got a spam mail that simply says inside:<br /><br />tea party beyond panics, and inside curse hibernates; however, tenor near fundraiser dance with..Indeed, chain saw over CEO mourn salad dressing about.Furthermore, over grand piano hides, and related to debutante avoid contact with bodice ripper living with.Where we can almost satiate our cab driver.Still eat her from dissident near impresario, operate a small fruit stand with her bicep for coward with looking glass for shadow.<br />sauterne bide cash curtsey influence typology handmade chloroplatinate <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />...how bizarre.<br /><br /><br />I think I shall make it into a poem. :D urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:168007 2004-05-07T11:00:31Z 2004-05-07T11:00:31Z Don't you feed me lines about some idealistic future...<br /><br />your heart won't heal right if you keep tearing out the sutures. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:167886 2004-05-07T08:34:20Z 2004-05-07T08:34:20Z HIM - Love's Requiem This song makes me swoon. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:161838 2004-04-17T00:06:07Z 2004-04-17T00:06:07Z <a href="http://www.gozer.org/cool_stuff/links/Jimmy_Tangos_Fatbusters.mpg">http://www.gozer.org/cool_stuff/links/Jimmy_Tangos_Fatbusters.mpg</a><br /><br />Jimmy Tango's Fatbusters!<br /><br />RIDE THE SNAKE!!<br /><br /><br />this is one of my all time favorite SNL skits. :) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:160907 2004-04-14T23:43:16Z 2004-04-14T23:43:16Z <a name="cutid1"></a><br /><br />BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!<br /><br />Oh 5atan how I hate that damn alarm clock! How I lout...loaht... fuck that <br />fucking clock! Why must it torment me so, making my life so unearthly <br />unbarbl... unberab... my life SuX0r!<br /><br />Hm, time to go to skool, the dreaded temple of humiliation and conformity. <br />What should I wear to look good before the other outcasts of society, my <br />friends that hang in the dark parts of the hall? They don't understand me <br />though, no one does. No one understands me better than the edge of my razor. <br />I don't know what that gidderish is supposed to mean, but it sounded pretty <br />cool. Where was I, ah yes, what should I wear? Something black of course. <br />Hm, should I wear my "I Kill Christians" shirt or the "You're All Sheep" <br />shirt? I think I'll go with the "You're All Sheep" shirt, they're quite in <br />right now, all the cool people wears them.<br /><br />Breakfast time. What??! Mother hasn't made any for me today?!! Oh these <br />horrors, withering my soul and cutting off my angel wings! I wish that <br />wicked witch hadn't given birth to me at all, I can't bring myself to end <br />this horrible existence myself, non-existance from the start must surely be <br />better than this dark pit of agoning hell. I didn't ask to be born, hell, my <br />parents won't even let me smoke pot in my room, and I'm 14, I should be able <br />to decide for myself. Oh look, there my breakfast is, she just put it in the <br />fridge instead of putting it on the table as usual. She's still a cunt <br />though.<br /><br />---- Later at Sk0oL ----<br /><br />There they are, my classmates. Avoiding me, as usual, leaving me out in the <br />cold to freeze to death in emotional winter. Conformed sheep. They fear me <br />though, ever since I said I was a vampire and tried to bite one of them in <br />the neck.<br /><br />Look, there's that Christian girl that goes to church. I bet she goes to <br />church because she's so happy and want to show everyone else, making us lost <br />souls feel even more depressed than before, that bitch, there's no way <br />someone could feel bad if they don't dress like a freak. They all dress the <br />same, they have no minds, yet they harrasse us intellct...intellict... smart <br />people. HEY, Christian girl! There is no God! He doesn't exist! Believe in <br />yourself, don't be a sheep! Believing in something without evidence is so <br />ignorant.<br /><br />Hey, there's my friends. Hey guys! Hail 5atan! Hail Man5on! Let's go pray to <br />the wiccan tree spirits of the lesbian goddess <br />Payformorestupidbooksofbullshit, wicca is cool, and afterwards we can go <br />have our pictures taken at the graveyard, it's so gothick and cool. You up? <br />Cool. We can go hang at my place afterwards and listen to gothick music like <br />Marilyn Manson and Cradle of Filth, but we can't smoke any pot, cuz my mom's <br />a cunt.<br /><br />---- Later that night ----<br /><br />Homework, bah! School just wants to numb us down and make us into zombies to <br />fit this stupid so-called society we live in. Physics? HA! Math? HA! I laugh <br />at your pathetic attempts to make us your followers of conformity! No, I <br />think I'll just log on to the Manson bbs, where I can find some REAL <br />intelligence. I hope there's a boob post up. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:160628 2004-04-14T23:39:15Z 2004-04-14T23:39:15Z something I wrote in my old journal that I just found... made me smile. <br />___<br /><br />pink fuzzy slippers, warm toasty bathrobe... hot coffee, watching the rain.<br />red velvet dragons slipping through the misty morning light, silently watching over their children, their ... guard-ees. butterfly paintings on bare naked, candle-lit skin. summer nights. chasing shadows in the setting sun.. freshly cut grass and fragrant flowers.<br />laughing children. innocence. silvery white cottonball clouds and sunsets so brilliant they'll make you cry. a warm cup of tea and your best friend's soft voice. cuddling, watching a fire in the dark. hot showers and good smelling soap. freshly shaven legs against warm, just out of the laundry, sheets. sleeping in and waking all warm and cozy under your covers, and just laying there enjoying it. waterfalls. bamboo. fresh fruit, hugs, chocolate. smiling. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:160274 2004-04-14T23:25:02Z 2004-04-14T23:25:02Z Fifteen men on a dead man's chest <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br />Drink and the devil be done for the rest <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />The mate was fixed by the bos'n's pike<br />The bos'n' brained with a markin spike and <br />Cookey's throat was marked belike It<br />Had been gripped by fingers ten and <br />There they lay all good dead men like<br />Break o' day in a boozing ken__ <br />Yo Ho Ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />Fifteen men of a whole ship's list <br />Yo Ho Ho and a bottle of rum<br />Dead and be damned and the rest gone whist! <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />The skipper lay with his nob in gore where the <br />Scullion's axe his cheek had shore<br />And the scullion he was stabbed times four and <br />There he lay and the soggy skies<br />Dripped all day in up-staring eyes at<br />Murk sunset and at foul sur-prise <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />Fifteen men of 'em stiff and stark <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br />Ten of the crew had the murder mark <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />'Twas a cutlass swipe or and ounce of lead or a <br />Yawning hole in a battered head<br />and the scuppers glut with a yawning red and <br />There they lay aye damn my eyes<br />All lookouts clapped on par - a - dise all<br />Souls bound just con - tra - ri - wise <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />Fifteen men of 'em good and true <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br />Every man Jack could ha' sailed with old Pew <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />There was chest on chest of Spanish gold with a <br />Ton of plate in the middle hold<br />And the cabins riot with stuff un told As <br />They lay there that had took the plum<br />With a sightless glare and their lips struck dumb<br />While we shared all by the rule of thumb <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />Fifteen men of a dead man's chest <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br />Drink and the devil had done for the rest <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum<br /><br />We wrapped 'em all in a mains'l tight with <br />Twice ten turns of a hausers bight<br />And we heaved 'em over and out of sight with a <br />Yo heave ho and fare you well<br />And a sullen plunge in a sullen swell<br />Ten fathoms deep on the road to hell <br />Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:daelia:160197 2004-04-14T23:21:38Z 2004-04-14T23:21:38Z Two muffins are in the oven.<br /><br />One looks at the other and says, "Damn it's hot in here!"<br /><br />The other one says "HOLY SHIT! A talking muffin!!!"